Happy to report

1.2k loss this week and considering the time I have had that is bloody AWESOME

Been out with friends this afternoon for coffee and cake Mum has a friend visitn from Ireland an it is her 69th b/day 2day Mum mustered up some of her friends to celebrate we had a good catch up one friend I said have seen u all year...she only lives 2k away but has just started a homestay bizz and is very busy.

Then we are off out tonight as family for dinner will be nice...new menu there so haven't had chance to check out what I'll have best be good to keep the 1.2 loss did I happen to mention that I lost 1.2k.

Off again tomorrow(was going to be Friday but decided to travell tomorrow give us Friday at Chch to do what we need to do) Fri night have a nite on the town with gals, hubby will stay at hotel or maybe visit with his friend in Bishopdale. Sat morning Aqua Fit is booked depending on lateness of Fri nite will depend on energy exerted at Aqua...then on the road again to Westport. Will be there mid late arvo...head straight to beach show hubby where he is to pick me up Sunday. Sunday 'well' as I had planned on doing the City to Surf in Chch Sunday but it couldnt be fitted in the schedule I flagged it and have decided to do my own I'll walk from my Aunties were we are staying to the best beach In NZ Carters Beach Westport which just happens to be 11.5k (City2surf is 12k) so wll still clock same miles just on different side of island and will be differnet surf...actually c2s hasn't finsihed at surf in a long time had to move it cause got to big but feel bit ripped off when it is really city to QE2 park hehehe. Holiday is till Wed then travel back as far as Amberley stay night there and thru middle of island home don't NEED 2 go to Chch so will cut it out and couple hrs driving as well home Thurday afternoon then work Friday THEN saturday back to Chch...now I can here u say but y come home at all...its like this we hadn't planned coming home but as I havent been available to work twice b4 when asked I felt I NEEDED to say yes to keep them sweet...and 31st would have been Chris 48th b/day and her and Jim's 30th wed anni and Ang asked me to come up I said of course then was asked to work so sorta between a rock and hard place....then this morning was asked to work monday 2nd April as well of course I was travelling back from CHH that day so had to say no then I rung back and said if I could start at 10 hubby could drive me snooze in car and leave chch at 6 he said that would be great he'd get back to me...of course the minute I offered I regretted saying it...but as it happens he came back with a counter off so to speak I am starting at 1pm so no made dash home and all is kept nice and they know I tried and changed my planns which hopefully will keep me in good there. So its busy time again. huh I am looking forward to a break from all this travelling but not gonna be anytime soon

Right off to get dressed ready for dinner-gonna walk car is at doctors and I am not getting in hubbies work truck in my good clothes then maybe I can have a wine with meal too or two or three maybe no more than three is travelling tom hang over and travel not a good mixture.

Cya all when I get back Monday 2nd April or there abouts.

Back from the toughest week of my life

TOUGH that is the understatement. But it was tougher for others. We got to town at 4 and went straight to Jim and Chris's Jim was mucking around in the shed and just looked so wasted..he is bashing himself up cause he wasn't at hospital but he wasn't to know. Poor Ang was trying so hard to keep it all together...she didn't want to get upset and her milk stop or baby Chloe get stressed...this wasn't working cause Chloe was very titchy all Sunday and screamed most of night so they took her to doc on Monday (it was very hot and she was just so unformfortable) doc sent her for blood test but all was well with those.
Jim had a terrible time..we left house at about 8 (meet with friends for dinner and laughed and tears and just wat I neeeded) but not long after we left a knock at door from police...Chris in her confused state had said she thought she didn't fall she was pushed...she had been very confused for about 2 weeks guess it was meds and stuff but she had things crawling on her or pple were coming to take her away and trying to poison her that sort of stuff..not always but often. Anyway because of what she had said and then her dieing they had to investigate....2.5hrs of horror ontop of everyting else not what they needed. Jim's brother arrived from oz early hrs of Monday morning and his sister and brotherinlaw later Monday.
Monday the celebrant came and talked thru the service Ang and Jim asked me to join them I was honoured then I went and did some 'stuff '
Tuesday I went and visited with friends I was invited to join Jim and his family for BBQ tea but declined felt it was there time together, Micheal arrived Mon morning his 27th birthday.
Wednesday I visited with more friends and then walking gals and I walked the bridal path my memorial for Chris We then went to dinner more laughs and tears.
Thursday was the funeral 1.30...I was amazed at just how many ppl arrived late I am talking nearer 2pm and one left her cellphone on and it rung just RUDE. We arrived to Elvis music just like she wanted, the Celebrant was great and what he said sounded sincere. Micheal did a fantasitc job what he said about his Mum pulled the emotional strings he stumbled just at the end and then Ang read a verse she did well Chris' nephew read an email from his Mum and Dad(Chris's brother unfortunately they were holidaying in oz) then he said words of his own...he said some lovely things and more tears and smiles. The others were asked to speak I had written some words but was too choked up to say them. Then the family and others were offered to place flowers on the coffin and say farewell. Savage Garden Truely Madly Deeply playing well thats it I lost it and when the chorus came I had to make a run for it

I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...

I was sick behind a tree and heaving my heart out crying...contained myself and went back inside by then the song was finished and flowers done so I missed my chance.
Went back to house after and enjoyed listening to stories etc about Chris most of course I knew or were part of it was lovely...we stayed till about 5.30.
I went for a walk on beach after then bought breadrolls and ham at countdown took it to my brothers for tea and had coffee with him then back to aunties about 9.30 EXHAUSTED.
Drove home Friday got home about 6.

Been a quiet week since just walking and blobbing off to golf now.

Savage Garden
Truely Madly Deeply

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I love you more with every breath
Truly madly deeply do..
I will be strong
I will be faithful 'Cos I'm counting on a new beginning.
A reason for living.
A deeper meaning.

Chorus
I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...

And when the stars are shining brightly In the velvet sky, I'll make a wish
Send it to heaven
Then make you want to cry..
The tears of joy
For all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded By the comfort and protection of.. The highest power.
In lonely hours.
The tears devour you..

I want to stand with you on a mountain,
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever,
Until the sky falls down on me... Bridge

Oh can't you see it baby?
You don't have to close your eyes 'Cos it's standing right before you.
All that you need will surely come...

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I'll love you more with every breath Truly madly deeply do...

Chorus

OH MY GOD

I got the phone call tonight that I just didn't want to get and it has shattered my life.
Chris passed away I can't beleive she has gone. What will I do without her. 12 mths today since her Mum passed away thank goodness Angela had little miss Chloe on 20th Feb and Chris got to meet her first grand child and Chloe has those photos to see the joy in her face at meeting that little bundle.

Chris and Jim moved in to house next to me when Angela and Anthony (my son) were about 2 Chris was preg with son Micheal...Ang and Ant played together and fougt together from daylight till dark EVERY DAY Chris and I spent hours talking...many a night Jim would come home from work at 4am and we would still be talking. We partied hard...u can PARTY PARTY PARTY now girl and no more hangovers.
Chris taught me to drive.
Chris picked me up when I fell down.
She was just always there.
We both moved out of that area after about 10yrs but she has still been a HUGE part of my life.

But for 12 or more yrs(as it turned out it was more like 17yrs) she has fought for life...she couldn't come to our wedding 12yrs ago Nov because she was to ill and we didn't think she'd see that Christmas but she did and she seen several more too she was a tough nut. She had so much health problems steeming from the original and some meds caused more illness but each time she battled on...but this last time she just couldnt fight any longer...Jim had been at hospital all day (Oh she would hate that she died in hospital she so hated that place) he went home about 4.30 she woke about 7 wanted a drink was uncomfortable so they rolled her over gave her another pillow or took one away something like that came back a few minutes later and she was gone...as quick as that...no more struggling for breath no more pain no more anything but oh wat am I gonna do with out my Chris my brick to jack me up with my shoulder to cry on my ear to scream at or just to listen...my friend

Going to Christchurch tomorrow...want to go now but no state to drive, not sure I will be tomorrow but can stop lots.

goodbye my friend rest in peace

Saturday-how original

had a good day...managed a 33k bike ride yah me.
Ate well..if u don't count the digestive biscuits I crunched my way thru this evening. my butt is going to fit those size 20 summer pants I bought end last season sales before winter I am determind of that....great feeling in controll again why do I fall off track when being on feels this good.
Wellington plans are coming together nicely must do something about ferry bookings.
Been checking out houses this week going thru the 'I am so sick of this travelling back and forth' thing again so talking moving closer to Christchurch wish i could take my house...looked at an AWESOME has everything on our list house online but it is so out of our price range it's not funny gonna buy a lotto ticket for tomorrow if I can muster up the $6 that is...worth a crack.

Just been talking to Jim (friends hubby) they operated this afternoon...spinal so recovery will be easier HOPEFULLY but he was pleased with all so far..and they have fianlly got respite care etc organised which just wasn't happening b4 so some good may have come out of it.

Just having a hot lemon drink then its bed for me.

SHIT DAMN AND BUGGER

those of u who pray please add my mate Chris to your list...I have spoken of Chris before she has had bad health for 12plus years and getting worse daily and now this...she ahd a fall last night and has broken here bloody hip. I was talking to her hubby tonight and not good if they don't operate she'll get an infection and die if they operate she will probably die in theatre...but they have to give her a fighting chance.
Chris you are in my thoughts constantly.

My weight loss is causing no end of havoc

about 12mths into my journey I read in the business section of paper that shares and sales in Cocoa Cola had slumped to all time low and now this its terrible...Tiptop are closing in Christchurch and why because in last 7 yrs(just happens to be exactly 7 years almost to the day since I started my journey) plant has made losses of 21million dollars...wow didn't think I ate that much icecream and why haven't I got a healthier bank balance for not now eating it...fresh fruit and fish sales must have sky rocketed in that time.

I have had a great weekend considering how it could have been.

We got to Chch on Thursday night I dropped Mum off at aunties and meet with the gals for 'supper' ( i made myself some salald and smoke chicken b4 leaving aunties so didn't eat just had much needed cold drink) left there jst b4 12..made arrangements for weekend and had some laughs.

Friday I when for a 30 min walk b4 starting the day cause knew it wouldn happen later...then we left for hospital braced ourselves for the sight of very tiny prem bub but she looked fantastic...Mum and Dad and big brother where there so we could go to the unit and right up to her crib...I was sure we would have only been able to see her thru the window at the most(memories of when my son was in unit like 30yrs ago...things have changed) and no gowns just wash hands. She is breathing on her own and since been moved to another end of unit and therefore closer to ward room...she is doing AWESOME. (sunday Mum went home so guessing she is fretting and at hosptital as much as possible). We spent an hr or so there by time we found carparks and rooms etc...we went back from unit to Mum's room and gave her all the bubby parcels by tiem I got to give them yes I agree there was a bit of stuff...but had to get some prem stuff and can't have a new great neice with out a pink teddy its just wrong. I won't tell anyone I still have a large bag of stuff herebut its bigger things and would look huge for Miss Chloe number 2 just now. After hospital I had arranged to meet my brother visiting from Perth still hadn't told Mum who we were meeting...so drove to arranged place...it was such a sight...Mum looking out car window I was trying to find a park, she said "gee that fella looks like David....IT IS DAVID" my ear is still ringing. So we picked him up took him back to Aunties and had lunch and chaatted. About 3 I took him back to place he is staying arranged to all meet for tea and I went onto see my friend (the one not at all well) and her granddaughter Chloe # 1 I got lots of holds and she is just so beautiful and the look of pride on Chris' face when she was awake and with it(cause she is fading and in the hr I was there drifted in and out of consiousness and one part the look on her face to her daughter as if she didn't know who it was SAD is not a strong enough word) So that was a neat visit if I didn't think of how bad Chris looked and she was determind to make it to hold her first grandchild and she did so all is good...one of the talks we had was that she is gonna hold on now till the wedding so would be great if she can but a huge thing me thinks...mind u this lady was suppose to be dead 10 yrs ago and many times in that 10 yrs she was very bloody close so she is a tough old bird and nothing would surprise me, but I miss the Chris I know and love...but have to get off that subject now cause I am getting teary.
After I left Chris I shot into Eastgate Mall and the warehouse put some baby toys on layby...went to $2 shop sale all stock half price so got Eli (big brother of Chloe number 2) a toy to play with at tea he and his Dad were joining us and he'd been a bit miffed in the morning with only getting 2 small parcels and baby got lots...and as I had been in my travels and collected some booties I had ordered for all 3 of the babies b4 going to Chris' I thought I'd get him a wee something else too. I also got some cute moulds for at beach train, boat, plane and thinking car but can't reember 4th one for making jelly in for hubbies b/day (train one anyways) and can use others for parties or kids visits...cute for $1. On way back to Aunties I took a wrong corner and got completely out of the way I was travelling and a 10 min trip took me 45 so it was screamed in door splashed water on some bits of body and out again with Mum for tea. Met both brothers, nephew inlaw (if they were married) and Eli big bro of Chloe number 2, and the girls and hubbies came too so it was a great table of fun and laughter...we stayed till nearly 10. Then parted company the girls and I arranged to meet next day for our Sat plans and off home for a much needed sleep...see why I knew I wouldn't get a walk in later in day.
Sat woke to screaming noise so dashed out of bed...Mum was sleep in bed aross room and Aunty was a sleep in her room wat was the noise...went to kitchen chairs on floor????? into loo cause by this time I was needing too and here was Aunties cat and a stray in the toilet...so I quickly shut doors to other part of house by this time Mum was up so screamed at her to stay out of course she opened door what is going on so she got YELLED at. Managed to get cats out checked for puddles and then explained what was going on...it came about later in day it was new neighbours over fence they had moved in earlier in week and first night they had left cat out...still not found on Monday. So needless to say I was awake by now...so decided I would go toAquasize afterall...had said I would have to give it a miss time wasn't gonna allow...so had brekkie and off for another full on day. Aqua was great and really felt I had done some good. Spa after was lubbly and really could have stayed in there longer...but was meeting Rach at 11 it was 5 past when I got out of spa so showered and dressed and she was waiting out side(I had txt change of plan) we then walked to Convention Centre but Jo was running late so decided to have a coffee I was goin to have a very nice looking apple and bran muffin but someone bet me too it darn them...so just had coffee everything else looked to sweet and not wat I wanted...then Jo arrived and we went to the Expo...NOT AT ALL MY CUPP OF TEA but the girls wanted to go and I couldn't get out of it as hard as I tried...Erotica need I say any more...except I have never seen so many naked beings in my life and hope to never see them again...some are in my memory for life and evertime I close my eyes I see them horror. Anyway think we stayed an hour or so I tried not to think about it at all reaally...then we went to Rachels changed into our walking clothes..by this time it was after 1 we needed feeding again so went to a yumy cafe in Ferrymead had a chicken and verge tortilla stack YUMMO and coffee and loads of water nattered for ages...Rachel wasn;'t keen to do walk so wasn't really incouraging moving. About 3 I said come on lets go so we parked car at Heathcote an off we went over the Bridal Path...this being the trek the Pioneers carved when they trailed from Lyttleton to Christchurch on arrival from the mother land....straight up hill (yesterday work friend said was it lots of hills I said oh no just one just took 45 mins to climb it) This is anther off my to do list The Bridal Path walk is something u gotta do with school but can't ever remember it being high on my list of excitement as a kid but now I am getting fitter and healthier I wanted to do it again and will do it more times it was great. By tiem we got there itr was VERY hot and took a lot out of ya but I ws determind to do it we got to top had a few wee leans on fencepost or tree on way up then ther is a very comfy fence at top we sat on for guessing 10-15mins b4 I got Jo to take photo of me by the memorial for Women Pioneers and off down other side to Lyttleton...straight down and loose single was hard to get a grip on sometiems and slipping wasn;t something to start when stopping wasn't readily available so caution was the word of day. 3/4 way my legs went a pequliar jelly and was a horrid feeling but me thinks it is a common one cause not long after there was a seat for looking at the scenery so we used it for a min or two and got our legs back and on we went into town and a LOVELY cold drink of Lemon Lime and Bitters never even thought to ask if they had diet...then we caught bus back to car...wait for bus was about 20mins Dropped Rach at her house she was off to a 6yr old b/day BBQ and Jo and I went ad got FnC for our teas dropped Jo at her gate and I went back to Aun ties I had said I'd cook Chicken Pasta but it was 8 by time I got the FnC and wasn;t in any fit state to be cooking tea and it not be ready for at least another hour...so what else can u do. Actually the chips were very nice and not at all greasy actually the paper had little if any grease and the fish was nice but I did eat the batter TOUGH Hubby rung spoke to hime while eating tea coffee and bed by 10...oh bed yeah!!!!
Sunday oh here we go all over agian...dropped Mum at Church in Ferry Rd(near where we had tea on Fri night and got FnC on Sat night but no where near we stayed travelled miles just on same peice of road all weekend) and I went over to Burwood Spinal Unit to see my friend who's hubby had accident last month....not looking forward to it at all. She was showering him when I arrived so I waited in family room for unfortunately most of time I had for visit but tough Mum would have to wait...when I did get to see them G wasn't as rough as I imagined he's be and they were both amazinly brigt and cheery and if possitive thinking does help recovery then they are gonna be ok cause they are both AMAZING. I am so glad I went and stayed for about an hour...txt Mum at 12 on my way collected her and off to Chch Womens Hosptial for another quick visit with baby and Mother b4 we leave town...as I said above baby had been moved so my neice was holding her when we arrived this was lovely to see...Eli was gettingrestless so we walked down to car feed some more money in metre and back up to ward which gave Mum and S a visit then we had to go. It was now like 1.30 and we were both starving so were going to get lunch at Denny's ick but carpark was full and we decided wold take to long...so went around to a place caled Rob Roys they have yummy Sunday roasts for $8 and they are bg meal and would keep us going for trip home so we had that couple coffees and lime and soda and were ready for next leg of day....grocery shopping actually it only took hour and 10 mins to shop and pack car sometimes takes hour jus to load car....then back to Aunties who by now had txt had we forgotten to go back for our stuff she thought we must have left town. Got our bags another coffee said our goodbyes and she was in tears cause she didn't want us to go guess her treatment has played with her emotions a bit. Left Chch at 4 traffic was bumer to bumper coming back into Chch all way to Raikia where we turned off for quieter road...there had been a motor bike rally on a classic car show soemthing with BMX bikes and horse floats so we decided a pony show along with the normal weeknd traffic it was BUSY. We got home after couple stops for coffee and toilets at just on 8.30 unpacked car put away perrishibles and BED slept like a log.

Did I have a nice weekend away yes I did but don't ask did I have a quiet restful weekend cause I will thump ya heheh

Yeah I am coming Sue

Sue asked in her blog who was going to do the Wellington Real women duathlon on May 6th http://www.realduathlon.co.nz/ I was trying to organise for me to get up there bike on plane etc was going to be a night mare and I was trying to organise hiring one but wasn't getting far with that either...then the other day I was saying to my g/friend here about what I wanted to do she said a road trip so we r looking at brining her vehicle bikes on back and coming up...am going to Chch AGAIN today and will tak with my Chch crew and see if them's two wants to come Rachel has just started new job so guessing she won't be able to but sure Jo would be keen...so looking more like I am coming of course have to be home long enough to earn some money instead of spending it but that is a just a minor trivial thing.

Now where am I going today Christchurch is calling me again. Not sure why I don't move back up there....thoughts turn that way every trip. Anyways why am I going again when only been up there a few days ago...WELL everything is happening...
1)my girlfriends daughter had her baby 21st Feb(I came home on 20th) Chloe number 1 all well (not due till 10th March) they are both home and doing fine.
2)My neice had her baby on Feb 26th (due April 12th so earlier than we'd like) she had compilcations with blood pressure etc word is baby and Mum doing great but I want to c for myself.
3) My brother is over from Perth, Mum doesn't know so will be nice surprise for her.
4) Walkig the bridal Path this is the trek the pioneers had to travel when got off boats at Lyttleton to Chch did it a million years ago at school because ya had to but now I want to...another thing off my 'to do list'
5) Aqua on Saturday
6) got some autions to collect
7) Aunty finishes her radium treatment
8) good excuse to catch up with the girls
9) was going to do another Duathlon but just can't see time allowing Sunday it is like 30 mins drive out of Chch then drive back to pick up Mum so flagged it and put it on next years To do list
10) my friend down south Husband had a dreadful accident at work and is parrilized from neck down so WANT to go see her.
amendment to list
11) Church for Mother
another busy weekend need to be back Sunday have work Monday...if it wasn't for work I'd have done the dua cause wouldn't need to drive home straight after

What have I done this week


Tuesday we hubby and I (he was supposedly my support) went to Timaru I had to have Colonoscopy so was full of prep gunk for that I can tell u when thye say be near a tiolet they mean BE NEAR A TOILET hehehe but oh I feel great I want more of that stuff that is a clean out and scales down 600gms yeah...would have thought I'd passed mre than that but that is to much information hehehe so stayed Tue night because it was just to hard travelling 2 hrs without a loo procedure was Wed morning and I was first on list so all over by 10.30 great...hubby couldn;t stay with me he had to do stuff more important than sit with his wife b4 surgery I txt him to say Iwas finished got told he was talking hhhmmm I gave him talking when he got there but he wasn;t long b4 he arrived and we had something to eat did a few groceries I needed fruit hadn't been allowed any for 4 days I NEEDED FRUIT i told him got to much with going away again today but can eat it in car etc.
Got home here about 4pm

oh of course bought some more baby stuff while away well u have to have a pretty soft cuddly pink teddy for a little girl niece great niece actually and got some wee prem clothes too

Ok I am off now back Tues but have jsut had a call from Mum to say ther is mail there from Anthony and Elaine in oz and she was sending photo of scan etc so I am off to see if that is what it is first grandbaby photos even if I can never see head nor tail of them hehe

WELL BUGGER ME DAYS-what a waste of bloody time that was..no baby scan photos bloody stupid eftpos card for me to do some banking for them double GGGGGRRR I want baby photos. can ya tell I am pissed off hehehe