Back from the toughest week of my life

TOUGH that is the understatement. But it was tougher for others. We got to town at 4 and went straight to Jim and Chris's Jim was mucking around in the shed and just looked so wasted..he is bashing himself up cause he wasn't at hospital but he wasn't to know. Poor Ang was trying so hard to keep it all together...she didn't want to get upset and her milk stop or baby Chloe get stressed...this wasn't working cause Chloe was very titchy all Sunday and screamed most of night so they took her to doc on Monday (it was very hot and she was just so unformfortable) doc sent her for blood test but all was well with those.
Jim had a terrible time..we left house at about 8 (meet with friends for dinner and laughed and tears and just wat I neeeded) but not long after we left a knock at door from police...Chris in her confused state had said she thought she didn't fall she was pushed...she had been very confused for about 2 weeks guess it was meds and stuff but she had things crawling on her or pple were coming to take her away and trying to poison her that sort of stuff..not always but often. Anyway because of what she had said and then her dieing they had to investigate....2.5hrs of horror ontop of everyting else not what they needed. Jim's brother arrived from oz early hrs of Monday morning and his sister and brotherinlaw later Monday.
Monday the celebrant came and talked thru the service Ang and Jim asked me to join them I was honoured then I went and did some 'stuff '
Tuesday I went and visited with friends I was invited to join Jim and his family for BBQ tea but declined felt it was there time together, Micheal arrived Mon morning his 27th birthday.
Wednesday I visited with more friends and then walking gals and I walked the bridal path my memorial for Chris We then went to dinner more laughs and tears.
Thursday was the funeral 1.30...I was amazed at just how many ppl arrived late I am talking nearer 2pm and one left her cellphone on and it rung just RUDE. We arrived to Elvis music just like she wanted, the Celebrant was great and what he said sounded sincere. Micheal did a fantasitc job what he said about his Mum pulled the emotional strings he stumbled just at the end and then Ang read a verse she did well Chris' nephew read an email from his Mum and Dad(Chris's brother unfortunately they were holidaying in oz) then he said words of his own...he said some lovely things and more tears and smiles. The others were asked to speak I had written some words but was too choked up to say them. Then the family and others were offered to place flowers on the coffin and say farewell. Savage Garden Truely Madly Deeply playing well thats it I lost it and when the chorus came I had to make a run for it

I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...

I was sick behind a tree and heaving my heart out crying...contained myself and went back inside by then the song was finished and flowers done so I missed my chance.
Went back to house after and enjoyed listening to stories etc about Chris most of course I knew or were part of it was lovely...we stayed till about 5.30.
I went for a walk on beach after then bought breadrolls and ham at countdown took it to my brothers for tea and had coffee with him then back to aunties about 9.30 EXHAUSTED.
Drove home Friday got home about 6.

Been a quiet week since just walking and blobbing off to golf now.

Savage Garden
Truely Madly Deeply

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I love you more with every breath
Truly madly deeply do..
I will be strong
I will be faithful 'Cos I'm counting on a new beginning.
A reason for living.
A deeper meaning.

Chorus
I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...

And when the stars are shining brightly In the velvet sky, I'll make a wish
Send it to heaven
Then make you want to cry..
The tears of joy
For all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded By the comfort and protection of.. The highest power.
In lonely hours.
The tears devour you..

I want to stand with you on a mountain,
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever,
Until the sky falls down on me... Bridge

Oh can't you see it baby?
You don't have to close your eyes 'Cos it's standing right before you.
All that you need will surely come...

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish
I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love
Be everything that you need.
I'll love you more with every breath Truly madly deeply do...

Chorus