Felicity's Weight Loss Journey

Hi my name is Felicity. I am 45, married 10 years November 05 and live in a small town in the middle of the South Island. I have been over weight since I was 11 and always hassled at school.

Monday, June 18, 2007

on a lighter note-but must keep in mind

had hoped all the little pictures and setting would have copied too but haven't and no time to adjust-this was sent to me this morning and bought a smile to my tired and wrinkly face It is worth sharing and gets that other depressing dribble off the front of my blog.

CURTAIN RODS---- PRICELESS She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things. On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candle-light, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water. When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left. When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to setoff gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days and inthe end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting. Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to work in the house.The maid quit. Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move. A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they couldnot find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to returntheir calls. Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place. The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and saidthat she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.. Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only ifshe were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork. A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched themoving company pack everything to take to their new home........ And to spite the ex-wife, they even took the curtain rods!!!!! I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU?!
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2 Comments:

At June 18, 2007 4:11 pm, Blogger Chris H said...

Ha ha Janene sent me that one this morning, I LOVED IT!!! Too funny eh? Just what we need sometimes, a bloody good laugh.... My husband was taking down the curtain rods in the lounge last night so I could paint the wall... how coincidental was that???? ha ha ha. How are your plans re: August coming???? NO pressure.. just hoping.

 
At June 19, 2007 3:09 pm, Blogger Lee-Anne said...

I read this a while back and I thought to myself - yep that's my kinda woman.

 

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